Sometime, in the early stages of our adoption journey, my husband and I had to make the difficult decision as to what special need child files we would be open to review. With the average wait of 6 years and climbing for “healthy” girls from China, the special needs program offered a shorter wait and often included very minor or correctable needs.
After much prayer we listed the needs we felt we could manage and waited for God to put his plan into action. Flash forward about 6 months and we received that highly anticipated phone call and email file! As I gazed at that beautiful face I noticed her big brown eyes and smooth skin, her adorable ears and her gentle hands…I did not even notice her unrepaired unilateral complete cleft…it just did not matter, she was our baby.
Our Princess was 20 months old and living in the remote mountains of Northern China.
But what is a cleft palate/lip? A cleft is a gap in the mouth that didn’t close during the early stages of pregnancy, and this kind of birth defect happens more often than you may realize. It is estimated that, worldwide, a child is born every 3 minutes with a cleft — about one in 500-750 births. Sometimes a cleft condition can be easy to see because it’s an opening in the lip. Sometimes it’s harder to tell if someone has a cleft because it’s an opening in the roof of their mouth (called the palate.)
There are many risk factors that can increase the likelihood of birth defects. While some causes are still unknown, genetics and family history, pre-existing medical conditions, poor nutrition and exposure to harmful environmental substances can affect the healthy development of a baby. As a result, these factors could also be the cause of a baby born with a cleft lip or cleft palate. We will never know why it happened but we will never know where her outstanding fine motor skills came from either…and that’s OK.
Our Princess after we met her in China, already charming her Mama and Baba
Cleft lip and cleft palate can be repaired through a series of surgeries and orthondontics. While it can be corrected, it really is not an “easy fix”…despite what you may see in Operation Smile advertising. Our brave girl has had 3 major surgeries and some pretty extensive speech therapy with quite a few more surgeries in her future…continuing into her young adulthood.
Her first surgery at Johns Hopkins
She is a spunky bright little girl who charms everyone she meets. She is very determined to speak clearly and has made huge strides with her speech therapy. The only real struggles we have with her are probably universal to every family with a three year old….Does the phrase “I do it myself” sound familiar? She is our joy and we are humbled and honored that God has entrusted her into our care. It really is a miracle.
Adorable! Brave, all of you!
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Bless you all!
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You were so brave to take on a special needs child by choice. However, your darling girl is by far the most brave of all! She has endured so much already and has much more left in the years ahead. As a retired pediatric special needs nurse I am aware of what you all are going through and pray for continued strength for your family. I so enjoy hearing about her progress and love the photos too. Thank-you for sharing your journey.
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Thank you. She always been beautiful and perfect in our eyes but we are blessed that people like you devote their lives to our little ones. She is a determined little girl and quite spunky. She keeps us on our toes.
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She is a miracle and right where she belongs with two loving and dedicated parents. I’m sure this has not been an easy journey for any of you but so worth it in the end. You have a beautiful and thriving little girl. Thank you so much for sharing this with us, Amy!
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Thank you. It most definitely has been a journey and this Mama’s heart breaks to think about how much she will have to endure. She is a brave girl and we our blessed to have her as our very own.
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Oh Amy, your daughter is so beautiful with a sweet, gorgeous smile!! I bet she just melts your heart. I have 3 daughters, and one is currently saying, “I do it” so I understand that stage well.
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